The in Between

seasons-blog

 

The in Between

~

I wish not to return-

To begin at a page many chapters behind

folded places to mark all the impressionable parts

(not too many I am afraid)

But sometimes in the story with a breaking of hearts

I left stains on the paper from my depleted tears,

underlined with red ink I may find

all the reasons to explain my deep fears

and go back on the story to connect I may try

all the dots from the long tedious chapters

the in between understanding the reasons

why a story begins with a cry

as it ends with the changing of seasons-

H.O


“And in the fall, the cold would wither that which was known, scattering new seed. In the spring, that which had been sleeping awoke and a new season of beauty began. For Life seeks life and builds a bridge across the darkest valley.”

― David Paul Kirkpatrick, The Address Of Happiness

Of what will become

Love and Loss (Angled)

 

Of what will become

~

I am tired-

My body crushed beneath the weight of a million years

my soul infected with the plague of disappointments craves

the silent rest of eternal night, the quiet weight of graves

to house my flesh, to complete my cycle and be home again-

And how I loved this life, forsaken roads leading to places

full of joy among the tears I shed at times of tribulation,

the miracles of flowers, sunlight and my laughing child.

I loved it all and made it mine in happiness and pain

all exhausted until nothing left but shadows in isolation

nothing left but dark stains of history mapping my skin

from where all began to where x marks the spot

of my here and now, tired from the weight of years-

~

The overgrowth hides the stone

carved letters of forgotten name

under a quiet lot facing the ocean

forever now  extinguished flame

H.O


“Life’s just a bunch of accidents, connected by one perfect end.”

― Daniel C. Tomas

Approaching Dusk

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Approaching Dusk

~

I fear the approaching dusk

stretched to fill the empty holes

my life will pass like summer rain,

and won’t be here

to dry your tears and sooth your pain,

to hold you dear

until the memories subside-

And things I asked about my soul

eternal life reserved for all,

to cross the light,

I just don’t know-

I fear my dusk approaching fast

eternal night

as cold as winter fallen snow,

and only you to hold me here-

H.O

“When he died, I went about like a ragged crow telling strangers, “My father died, my father died.” My indiscretion embarrassed me, but I could not help it. Without my father on his Delhi rooftop, why was I here? Without him there, why should I go back? Without that ache between us, what was I made of?”

― Kiran Desai

Death Knocks Once

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Death Knocks Once

~

Dry oak fingers taping tunes on roof tiles

late night winds howling songs of past times

in a daze spooky dreams turned to rhymes

caught between being awake and asleep

if I die pray my soul god to keep

~

Don’t come calling until sins reconcile

fears play under shadows of death

when she takes life away in one breath

no one there to bemoan or to weep

if I die pray my soul god to keep

~

And in dreams every moment conspires

to make fears come alive in my bed

while in slumber I’m already dead

one loud knock to arouse me from sleep

if I die pray my soul god to keep

H.O

Pale death, with impartial step, knocks at the hut of the poor and the towers of kings. -Horace
~~~
I woke up again in the middle of the night with a knock. It happens often and at first I would get up and check the doors but no one there. I stopped looking and simply go back to bed but that knock wakes me up every time.

Illusions

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Illusions

~

I create illusions reflected on your mirror

but it’s only me the one to see the light

in between the cracks, what if I don’t fight

and allow this place to reflect my fears?

Only one direction where the river flows

and can either swim or just let it take me-

If the truth sometimes translate in years

should I give up now that I’m slightly ahead?

Maybe life is life and nothing more to be

than another man living on the edge

of a life illusion, while already dead.

H.O

“One sometimes weeps over one’s illusions with as much bitterness as over a death.” Guy de Maupassant

Not Broken

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Not Broken

~

Not broken, slightly lost

I will seek no direction than what time

had inscribed on my skin,

to embrace who I am ‘til the end

all ahead while my dreams trail behind.

Not broken, mostly spent

and in fear I will learn to begin

every day as it comes ‘til the end.

H.O

Keep walking, though there’s no place to get to.
Don’t try to see through the distances.
That’s not for human beings. Move within,
but don’t move the way fear makes you move.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

Forever

forever

Forever

~

In young death we live forever-

Time stripping dreams from aging flesh never

as never footprints to fade on paper roads

we traveled,

while life slowly unraveled

into a short lived story condemned

to an existence of words we penned.

And age turn emotions into regrets

when love carelessly forgets

to stop by and stay.

So we die young to keep sins at bay

hidden in rhymes written in haste,

for years past youth become waste

if dead poets live forever-

H.O